daily emancipation

I fear that despite all of the progressive work you do, and the brilliant vision you carry in your heart, there is an equally dingy aspect to you. I have accepted your probing and pressing- trying to take what i could from it- but it turns out- theres no point. We are on different levels. at this point, i do not appreciate the finer nuances of you- and talking to you is like talking to an overseas relative who cares much, but just has a different approach. this morning, over coffee, you gave me lecture on how i have to be fearless, followed by a lecture on how i should also be vulberable and open, went on to ask that i give you a painting, and instructed me to come with you to africa to sleep in a hut,all before our order arrived. over oatmeal and french toast, you asked me what i was doing this weekend, and when i told you my plans, you were disappointed, because you wanted to to go a movie with me. even though early last month i clearly told you that i am not interested. there was also some talk about the huge sum of money ythat you are laying out to build not one, but three schools in africa. have you abandoned your community? or are just just one-upping Oprah? Perhaps when you are over there- sleeping on a dirt mat, you will be able to find 3 small African children to adopt. That way, you will have also out- done Madonna. after you finished your french toast, you issued a stern admonsihment that if i didnt pick up the pace you were going to put me over your knee and spank me. rendered speechless, and slightly concerned that if i opened my mouth i would tear a hole in you so large that i would regret it, i coyly responded ” i’m afraid that would only make me more willful”. as we sipped coffee and waited on the bill, we mused over minimalism and the dangers of ownership, you mentioned that you regretted that your position often forces you to keep quiet- twice. When i responded with an open- ended question to this raised concern you asked me to step off of my analytical high- chair… did it threaten you? and didn’t you just finish expounding on the benefits of transparency? When we parted, i gave you a hug. and you kissed my cheek. and now, everytime i move, i get a whiff of your cologne, and it makes my stomach turn.